Saturday’s Songs – Supernova by Ray LaMontagne, White Lies by Max Frost, Valerie by Amy Winehouse
I was driving to a friend’s house one evening last week. At last it felt as if summer might come this year. It was a gorgeous evening, the brilliant sun casting a golden glow, and yet my mood was down. The friend I was visiting has lived near me for over 40 years and she’s moving away, far away, in a few days. No more meeting up for lunch or dinner. I’ve been back and forth to her house to help her pack. Mostly, I’ve been cherishing the time with her.
I wanted to cheer up before I arrived at her house. I didn’t want to bring her down into my mood! I want her to be excited about her move.
The music gods must have heard the yearnings of my heart – so they guided me to some fabulous upbeat dance music on my car radio! And, as I drove along, I sang and seat-danced my way to cheerfulness as I drove the 30 minutes to my friend’s house.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQVxFPxYyw0
Three songs did the trick –
Ray Lamontagne’s Supernova (This song’s video is so retro to the era of my teen years – it’s awesome!)
Max Frost’s White Lies (Love the beat of this tune.)
Amy Winehouse’s Valerie, which I think I’ve posted before. (Love Amy. Love this upbeat version of Valerie.)
Jump up and dance!
Sunday’s Snapshots – Images of New England
As I walked yesterday there was one scene after another that defines the springtime look of New England. In the late afternoon sun, all was bright and long shadows were cast across expanses of lawn. It’s still cool here with the temperature staying in the low 60s. But June has arrived so warmer days are ahead!
Saturday’s Song – Viking Hearts by Miniature Tigers
This song was brought to my attention this week and I love the unpolished sound accompanied by the unpolished video.
Very sweet, simple and true. (A bit uplifting after my last post…)
On Marriage In The Season of Weddings
I keep coming upon expressions from the hearts of friends and strangers through Facebook and other social media about the endurance of their marriages. I suppose this is because we are in the busiest time of year for weddings so lots of anniversaries fill the calendar.
Some announcements are congratulatory in nature, sharing that it is their –st or –rd or –th anniversary. They proudly if wearily say they’ve hung in through “thick and thin” and that they are glad they did. They say they’d marry so-and-so again and “do it all over again” and that “the best is yet to be.” Some publicly thank their spouse for the years of their partnership.
It’s all lovely and we click “like” as some of us wonder in the quiet of our minds why we didn’t find such happiness and others pretend that they have or actually (and perhaps worse) believe that they have when in fact they have not.
These congratulatory anniversary messages support and keep alive the idea of “until death do us part” that our culture has driven so deeply into our psyche that we can’t help believe that to do less is a failure.
Of most concern to me is the expectation these announcements put on young people who are recently married or who are contemplating marriage.
So, to be clear for you young people embarking upon this commitment to hang in by your partner’s side through thick and thin and until death, here’s what I would advise you about “thick and thin.”
Thick and thin is –
– hanging tough and finding solutions through
— health crisis (yours, your partner’s, your children’s)
— lulls in your love
— lulls in your expectations from the other
— each others growth that changes the terrain of your marriage
Thick and thin is –
– finding supportive strategies for each other when
— one or the other is exhausted or stressed
— one or the other loses a job
— your children tax you to the limit with colic, a disability, behavior challenges or substance abuse
— you need to care for each other’s parents
Thick and thin is –
— allowing each other to bring into the marriage his/her own way of doing things
— realizing that you each come from histories that will not mesh perfectly and accepting that without judgement of the others ways
— understanding that you will likely have different ideas of each others roles and patiently allowing for the time needed to sort out who does what, who’s better suited for whatever, and knowing these things may change over time
Thick and thin is not –
to tolerate –
— physical or verbal abuse toward you
— physical or verbal abuse toward your children
— episodes of rage that make you or your children feel unsafe and threatened
— repeat substance abuse or addictive behaviors that put you and/or your children at physical/emotional/financial risk
— physical or verbal behaviors that overtly or subtly demean you or your children
— behaviors from your partner that stunt your personal, professional, creative or spiritual growth
— behaviors from your partner that intimidate and/or silence you or your children
— behaviors from your partner that create isolation from or distance between you and your family or your friends as a means of control
— mental/emotional illness for which your partner refuses to seek help and that seriously and negatively impacts your or your children’s wellbeing
— behavior that withholds love, financial support or anything else from you or your children as a means of manipulation
— disloyalty to you through affairs (how you resolve this is personal to each union, but repeated affairs that hurt you should not be tolerated)
If you find yourself in any of these situations you should seek counseling and break free, even if you love your partner or love aspects of him/her. Any condition that is diminishing you should not be suffered. That is not what is meant by “thick or thin.”
Toilet seat up or down, cabinet doors open or close, tidiness of closet space, direction of toilet paper roll, cap on or off toothpaste — these things are part and parcel of living with anyone and mature compromise should be expected. This is not the stuff to make or break a marriage or relationship (unless they are used deliberately to burden or enrage, in which case the problem is much bigger and probably addressed above).
I’m not sure a person can experience a greater reward in their earthly life than to find a partner who complements (meaning: that completes or brings to perfection) their nature and with whom true love is found. It is a gift and a joy to be in such a relationship. Few find it but it is what we each deserve and should seek and if found, enjoy and nourish.
Though the image above is of a man and a woman, the post applies to all couples, whatever gender.
Memorial Day 2014
View from the summit
Wednesday of this past week, I enjoyed several hours at Tower Hill Botanic Garden in Boylston, Mass. The weather was springtime glorious, neither too hot nor to chilly and what clouds were in the sky didn’t seem to block the brilliant sun. I was amazed at how much was already in bloom though a friend has told me that to come at the height of summer is really a treat, when the grounds are a cornucopia of flowering plants.
Tower Hill is a wonderful place to walk trails while enjoying both wild and cultivated landscapes.
Here is a gallery of photos I took on Wednesday. They show some of the wildflowers, cultivated flowers, a sampling of the plethora of tree varieties on the property, the ornamental structures throughout the acreage, the summit view of Mt. Wachusett and the Wachusett Reservoir, and the setting of the sun from a most advantageous spot – the Twigs Cafe patio, where a duo serenaded the diners with a wonderful array of American jazz/pop classics from the ’40s through the early ’70s. The music is a Wednesday night only event. The menu is simple (few selections) but our dinners were delicious.
From start to finish, the day’s visit to Tower Hill Botanic Garden was a complete delight. I can’t believe I have never been to this place before. I encourage you to visit. I hope to get there again soon. It’s about 40 minutes north of the Sturbridge area of the Mass Pike. It’s accessible from Rts. 90, 290 and 495. Directions are provided at the website.
Here’s a link to the map of the gardens and trails. Note the wonderful year-round calendar (at the bottom of the page) of what’s to see and when.
If you’re interested, here’s the Tower Hill Botanic Garden video from their website.
I visited with my brother this week – a brother who’s a few years older than I. His memories of the music of the ’60s is much better than mine. Not unrelated to the topic of this post, he was showing me his new Roku streaming player. I pretty much never watch t.v. but the benefit of the simplicity and intuitive function of this player was not lost on me.
As my brother showed me how Roku worked, we saw a documentary in the screen offerings that we decided to watch:
Greenwich Village: Music That Defined A Generation.
It was a thoroughly enjoyable hour and a half film. Lots of interviews with the who’s who of the Village at the time – the early ’60s. Lots of talk about the biggest name to come out of that place and time, but no now-a-day interview with Dylan himself.
As we watched the show, my brother filled in lots of gaps and offered tangential stories to the film, some specific to his experiences of that time, others a broadening of a story touched on in the film. We were able to have these sidebar chats as Roku allows the viewer to pause a film for any length of time. It also allows for a 16 second rewind if you’ve miss hearing something or want to review a clip.
Anyway, a few days later, one song is still stuck in my head. I remember saying to my brother when the opening notes and lines began, “Oh, wow, I remember this. Hearing it is giving me the chills.” The specific meaning of “the chills” was “a shudder of emotion.” Some songs just absolutely nail the feel of the time in which they were released. The opening of this song caused a visceral reaction in me. It transported me to my youth. It’s a fantastic folk song with such a forlorn feeling and yet it is positively beautiful.
The song is Four Strong Winds by Ian & Sylvia – written by Ian (Tyson). A You Tube version of the song is the opening image of this post.
I’ll also share this great version by Neil Young – whose music I love.
Yesterday I went for a walk along my usual route. But I veered off my path to go to the Stevens Coolidge Place in North Andover, Massachusetts. What a treat. The gardens are lovely with their spring newness and fresh blossoms.
I didn’t have my camera with me so I used my htc one phone camera. I have to say this camera is fantastic. I doubt I’ll ever get a quality print out of a photo, but it never disappoints for screen display. A gallery of images is above. I encourage you to click on the images and scroll through them for better viewing.
Sometimes you’ll see what look like repeat photos in the gallery but you’ll note that I was playing with light. With the phone I don’t have the settings of my camera. Still, it’s remarkable to me how easy it is to vary the lighting by moving or tilting the phone to capturing more (or less) of the source of light. I also tap the screen where the light or darkness is, enabling the camera to read and alter the lighting of the shot. I had a great time in the Stevens Coolidge garden as the sun began to set and the lighting was awesome.
I also want to point out something of interest at Coolidge Stevens Place. Here are two photos of a ribboned brick wall that runs alongside one edge of the gardens. There is only one other place where I’ve seen this style of brickwork – along Fresh Pond Parkway in Cambridge, Massachusetts. I think I’ll google and see what I can learn about this distinctive style of brick work.
I can’t say enough about the htc one phone camera. So, I’ll let one more photo do my talking for me. I took this next photo one day last week and posted it to my Instagram page. What’s not to LOVE about this shot?! This is a cropped section of the photo – not even half of the whole image. It held the resolution pretty well for a phone camera. The detail is incredible. Also, that bee was not just sitting pretty. It would stop for may 1.5 seconds on a blossom, often with obstructed view, and then move on to another blossom. I finally resorted to just picking a focus section on the screen and then following the bee, blossom to blossom, trying to keep it in the focus area as I hit the “shutter” button repeatedly. It took me about 20 minutes to get this shot! But it was worth the time and the stiff muscles I had afterwards from standing and moving awkwardly!
This week I began to read a book of Russian short stories. Of course Tolstoy is in the collection. I was so intrigued, then, to see this post at Interesting Literature (a blog I follow) that includes film footage of Tolstoy! It’s remarkable footage of the two sides of his life – his aristocratic life and his interaction with the peasants. If you have time beyond the five minutes it will take to watch the footage posted by Interesting Literature, here’s a ten minute silent film about Tolstoy. http://interestingliterature.com/2014/05/16/classic-footage-of-famous-writers/
Did you know Mark Twain and Count Leo Tolstoy were captured on film? Although they’re associated with the nineteenth century, both writers lived until 1910 and would be filmed in their final years when the technology was still in its infancy. (Mark Twain, who had been born two weeks after Halley’s Comet appeared in 1835, died the day after it next made its return in 1910 – something he had predicted would happen.)
As a Friday treat, we thought we’d share these two videos of footage of these classic nineteenth-century novelists.
First, Mark Twain, in 1909, filmed by none other than Thomas Edison. The footage was filmed at Stormfield, Mark Twain’s estate in Connecticut.
Second, Leo Tolstoy, author of War and Peace, in 1908 when he was an old man of 80.
Disclaimer: We share these videos here on a share-alike basis, since they have been made freely available by…
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I love writing and I love science. So, for me, the post I’m sharing with you today from Writing for Nature is a tremendous pleasure to read. Great writing, great science. Plus the bonus of mythology – click on the Ymir link when you come to it!
A big “thank you” to author Neahga Leonard, aka EarthKnight.
My apologies for the long gap between posts, life has been a bit busy.
I recently began a new position in Vietnam, on Cat Ba Island to be specific. My first impressions are that this is a damp and precipitous landscape. I have not seen the sun since I arrived in Vietnam on March 4th. For Cat Ba Island this means a riotous profusion of greenery tempered by the steep terrain and lack of soil.
Where the northern end of the road terminates
This is a land where Ymir’s bones lie close to the surface, broken and weathered, their calcium leaking back into the waters from which these precipitous cliffs rise. The geology is the first thing that strikes you here. The cliffs have been weathered by millions of years of rain, the ever-so-slightly acid rainwater eating into the ancient limestone creating a mature karst landscape. Like bones, coral, and…
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sublime days 